Thursday, April 19, 2012

Death Fear & Initiation

Human beings are often afraid of death, without knowing it. Death is like the ghost in the house no one sees; but everyone knows the ghost is there. Sometimes you feel death's presence .. or sometimes you see it on the road.

No one stopped to pick up the pigeon on the road.

At first, the pigeon looked like it was dead; lying on the asphalt of a busy town square. People were walking by, pretending not to see the bird or feel it's distress. No one saw the bird! At least, no one looked down - and yet - everyone managed not to step on the birds body.

Okay! The pigeon is dead! So, what's the point of stopping?

Since I was a small kid, I always take dead birds off the road and put them on the grass out of respect. Why should this pigeon be any different? No one appeared to see the pigeon lying on the asphalt; but they all watched me slow down and then stop.

I could see that the pigeon was still alive; but close to death. I stopped and carefully picked up the bird, then I looked around for a way down to the old castle moat, now filled with grass and tall trees. In the eighth Century this area was established as a Frankish settlement, part of the Frankish kingdom both during Merovingian and during Carolingian times.

It was an extended moment of frozen silence.

Everyone was watching me carrying the bird, as I walked extra slow and carefully not to cause unnecessary movement. The pigeon knew the love was there as it held the skin of my hands with its prehistoric feet. People tried to be discreet and not look straight at me; but they all watched me carry the pigeon down through the moat to the grass.

Then I looked around for a place to put the pigeon. I tried to help the spirit of the bird to let-go. But death is strange and inconvenient. Like Saturn (severe and disciplined) with Pluto (transformational and uncompromising) .. the bird would not let go. Its physical body destroyed and broken, eyes closed that would never open .. the bird kept breathing with an intent hard to understand.

The spirit guides told me to leave the bird alone with the giant three hundred year old tree. This bird was not afraid of death, it had a spirit as strong as I have rarely encountered, with powerful intent. The birds, in Spring, are building and repairing nests .. forming bonds and alliances .. the pigeon was holding on for reasons other than its own welfare.

How can people living on this Planet not stop and care for a hurt animal or bird? That's what I was thinking as I carried the dying pigeon down to the ancient roots and grass of the giant tree. It is our fear of death .. where we humans try to politely avoid death and therefore avoid transformation and initiation.

The growing forming form of a foetus (animal or human) dies unto itself as it makes its journey to physical reality. The tiny chick inside an egg transforms from the being within the fragile egg to the small being entering this physical world. Birth and death are one process leading to the mystery of transformation.

To inwardly, psychologically hide from this deeply moving force of inner transformation .. creates brutality. Fear of death creates insensitivity. To deny death is to deny the inner mysterious force that gives birth to life, where death is itself a form of re-birth.

The dying bird soon became a dance of life, death and transformation between human and bird as I carefully picked up the dying pigeon. People were in a state of shock, they were standing around frozen in time, wanting to reach out, wanting to help, inwardly wanting to do something .. but no one dared to show their inner compassion - their inner vulnerability.

This strange Plutonic transformational event came to me from the energy of the Planets: Sun. Moon, Mercury and Uranus in Aries .. Venus in Gemini .. Mars in Virgo .. Jupiter Taurus / Saturn Libra .. Neptune Pisces / Pluto Capricorn. Pluto square Neptune, Mercury and Moon. I say this because we humans are in relationship with ourselves, the Planet Earth, animals and birds, plants and trees .. as well as the Moon and the Sun, our Solar System and the surrounding harmony of the Planets.

Death, Fear & Initiation
Death touches us in many ways! Love is a form of death! Compassion is a form of death! When you feel compassion there is a mysterious bond between you and the Universe. You as a personality ego die [come to an end] as you awaken to your own spirit being presence.

Compassion is not my or your compassion...

All the people watching me froze as I knelt down beside the dying pigeon and then picked it up. These people watching me were relieved and they felt my compassion. They all felt the love. The love and compassion spread from this human interaction to enter the hearts of the people frozen in time .. the people unable to act or do anything.

It is not that we do not feel the love; but we are afraid to enter compassion and to enter initiation...

Death touches us and it is natural to feel fear! Never be afraid of fear...

In a positive way fear is natural .. but what is not natural is to FREEZE .. to stop the natural flow of Qi [life force energy] .. perhaps we feel fear and in that moment where time does not exist .. the door of Initiation opens before us and inside us.

The inner and outer door of Initiation is yourself.

Lifetime after lifetime the spirit [your spirit] swims through oceans of cosmos. Spirit is free. Spirit is eternal. Spirit has no fear. The fear enters when physical reality is threatened. Transformation is when a spirit being suddenly moves beyond the psychological restrictions of time and space to act as one.

We have to love the trees, we have to love the plants, we have to love the earth, we have to love the animals and fish, the birds and insects. We have to love ourselves...

The pigeon born-of-love left this physical planetary sphere .. of which we humans are one part of one whole !! The inner Initiation is the energy-to-act .. the energy to initiate .. to move with the flow .. to naturally be part of the flow-of-life.